PRESIDENT BIDEN ABSOLVES HIMSELF OF ALL RESPONSIBILITY FOR ANYTHING BAD THAT IS HAPPENING IN AMERICA.

Washington, D.C. (Wokeville) — As inflation tops out at 8.3% and gas prices are soaring to record highs across the country, many Americans are looking for someone to blame. President Biden wants the American people to know this: whoever is to blame, it certainly isn't him.

Early Wednesday morning, Jen Psaki—who is leaving resigning at the end of the month to pursue her career in Fake News—made it clear that President Biden takes no responsibility for anything negative about the economy. And in an unexpected move, Biden slipped away from his handlers, wandered up to the podium and began to answer questions on his own.

When asked who bears the blame for the 8.3% inflation, Biden insisted it was President Trump's fault.

"Come on man", said Biden. "Donald Trump is a racist. What do you expect from an unqualified and xenophobic man like Trump".

A journalist from MSNBC kindly reminded President Biden that Donald Trump is no longer President, and Biden used the opportunity to blame the American voters.

"I know that", snapped Biden. "But why isn't he president? It's because the American people didn't vote for him. They voted for me. I gave them well over 40 years of evidence that I was not only unqualified for this position but was not someone that could be trusted; especially when it comes to running a whole country and what not".

Shocked at Biden's candor, and not willing to miss an opportunity to ask even more pointed questions, Fox news reporter Peter Doocy asked the President if he feels any responsibility about the recent shortage of baby formula and other necessities.

"Come on, you stupid son-of-a-[obscenity]", mumbled Biden. "Don't be an idiot. I don't even have breasts. How could I dry my breast milk and turn it into powder? This guy, what a clown. I may not know who is to blame for everything that's going on around here, but one thing I know for sure is that it isn't me. Does anyone know where Hunter is? He certainly seems to know how to screw things up".

Just then, Biden's handlers abruptly ended the press conference and gingerly walked President Biden out of the room. And though we can't say for sure where they took the President, it is clear that he had said all he was going to say today.