Philadelphia, PA — Life is full of ups and downs, but for one Pennsylvania man the journey to live out his boyhood dream came to an abrupt end during the biggest health and economical crises in modern day American history.

"I worked my whole life for one thing, and it was very difficult to swallow the reality of my dream no longer being a possibility.", said Mitch Cruise. "I wanted to make a real difference in people's lives. I wanted to be seen as a guardian of autonomy, freedom, and happiness for those who feel trapped and paralyzed by their circumstances and are left completely hopeless because of it. My heart broke when I realized I could no longer be that source of hope and freedom for people anymore."

However, after talking with his family and friends about his difficult decision, Mitch found a glimmer of light in the darkness. "I told him his dream doesn't have to end", said his good friend Stan. "When one door closes, another door opens. You just have to recognize it for what it is and be willing to walk through it. Then you'll find a whole new world of opportunities you never even knew existed before."

That's when the idea of going to med school, to become an abortion doctor, came up. "If you think about it, there really are a lot of similarities between the hitman business and the abortion business", said Cruise. "You still get to offer help to people who find themselves in desperate situations—most frequently caused by their own actions—and are looking for a way to escape the natural consequences of their choices. These people are willing to do whatever it takes to get their lives back, regardless what other lives that choice may effect. I really see this as more of a lateral transfer than I do a demotion or loss of a dream. The only real difference between being a hitman and performing abortions is that one is illegal and can land you in prison and the other is celebrated and can award you quite a nice life. So, really it's a win-win."

Mitch told us that there are other hidden benefits in making the shift from being forced to meet people on the dark web via clandestine meetings, and being able to freely talk about his profession around the dinner table.

"The funny thing is, whenever my grandma used to ask me what I did for a living, I would always tell her I was in sales", said Cruise. "She used to give me such a hard time, because she thinks sales is a less-than-honorable profession full of immoral people who prey on the most vulnerable. Now when my grandmother asks me what I do, I tell her the truth. As a longtime feminist, she is very proud of me."

Mitch Cruise is in his first year of med school, at Drexel University College of Medicine, and he hopes to graduate early so he can get back to what he loves doing, namely, killing people. When asked if he ever sees himself going back into the illicit business of assassinations, he wasn't willing to close the door entirely. "That's a great question", said Cruise. "Yes, there are days where I miss the thrill and challenge of killing someone who actually has the ability of fighting back. However, it sure is nice not to constantly be looking over your shoulder or left wondering if the person on the other end of the phone or email is really who they say they are or some federal agent looking for sufficient evidence to make your arrest. At the end of the day, the only real difference between my old profession and the one I'm pursuing now is semantics, and yet the freedom I'll have to proudly be my truest self is hard to put into words. I'd be lying if I told you I wasn't looking forward to finally being rewarded, celebrated, and recognized for the difficult work I do instead of being shamed, shunned, or repudiated."

​

Washington, D.C. — In what many are now suggesting was misstep, Judge Amy Comey Barrett said Monday that she would 'interpret the laws and the constitution as they are written'.

"It was an unbelievable moment of candor, where Judge Barrett showed all of America who she really is and what she really believes. And I can't imagine she did it on purpose", said Dianne Feinstein, the ranking member of the Senate Judiciary Committee. "We kept trying to walk her to exposing her true motives and bent—as a judge--but I'm amazed that we were able to accomplish this feat."

The Ginsburg standard, which has been the standard for Supreme Court nominees for decades, was quaintly captured as: 'No Hints, No Forecasts, No Previews' but what we saw on Monday is that Judge Amy Comey Barrett, an originalist, clearly showed how she would interpret the law and apply it to any cases she is a part of on the Supreme Court.

"We can't have a sitting judge, on the US Supreme Court, who believes it is her responsibility to judge cases in the 21st century, based on a document that was written hundreds of years ago", said Senator Durbin. "While the Constitution may be a founding document of our nation, we have shifted away from this document in the past several decades. Congress no longer sees it as our responsibility to write or change laws and we rely heavily on the Supreme Court's responsibility to establish laws. To hear that Jude Barrett does not share these convictions and precedence is alarming, and really calls into question her qualifications."

"I apply the law, I follow the law, you make the policy", said Judge Barrett in response to Senator Durbin. "I have a responsibility to respect the laws, as they are written. Judges don't change, adjust, or make laws. That is the responsibility of the American people, through the representatives they send to Washington. Judges hold the responsibility of interpreting those laws and making our legal judgements based on those laws. If people desire something to be considered a law, they need to make it a law."

This statement further dumbfounded democrat members of the Senate Judiciary Committee. "We can't stand for this", said Senator Leahy of Vermont. "The American people need to assurance that we can count on the Supreme Court to do what they have done for decades; namely, making and changing policy. We have seen the inability of Congress to do their job and we are dependent on the US Supreme Court to our job for us. As elected officials, it is inappropriate for us to be forced to put our jobs on the line by making laws and policy that some constituents may not like. As lifetime appointees, judges do not carry the same pressure of potentially losing their jobs and we must have the confidence that we can continue to count on the Supreme Court to do the heavy lifting for us."

Washington, D.C. — In what could have finally put the confusion to rest, the White House was asked again to publicly and unambiguously denounce white supremacy. Instead, Press Secretary Kayleigh McEnany chose to shift the focus to the countless amounts of times that President Trump has already done so.

"It's really sad", said one journalist we spoke with. "She was given a perfect opportunity to once again put this story to rest, by denouncing the evils of racism, and yet she dodged the opportunity by pointing us to historical facts. Once again, this proves that Donald Trump and the White House care far more about the support they receive from these racist organizations, than they do about calling out evil."

"Yesterday, [the President] was—point blank—asked 'do you denounce white supremacy' and he said, 'I've always denounced any form of that.'", McEnany said, when responding to a question from a reporter. "I can go back and read for you in August of 2019 the president said, 'in one voice our nation must condemn racism, bigotry, and white supremacy.' In August of 2017, he said 'racism is evil and those who cause violence in its name are criminals and thugs; including the KKK, neo-nazis, white supremacists and other hate groups.' I have an entire list of these quotes that I can go through with you. He has condemned white supremacy more than any other president in modern history."

The reporter then asked, "Just to clear it up, this morning. Can you make a declarative statement that the President denounces it?" To which, McEnany said, "I just did. The President has denounced this repeatedly."

"That was her chance and she blew it", said another reporter we spoke with. "She was given the perfect opportunity to finally let us know how the president feels about this issue and instead all she did was point us back to old statements where the President let us know exactly how he feels about this issue. It was a missed opportunity and now Americans are left to wonder how the President feels about this issue."

It is strange that the White House wouldn't want to take every opportunity given to denounce something so evil. Of course—in light of the President's willingness to answer the question himself just yesterday—there are those who might assume the issue should have been put to rest already. However, to strike out looking on a softball pitch that could have been hit out of the ball park, does leave people to ask the question, why does the President refuse to denounce white supremacy?

"It's really strange", said the reporter who was pressing McEnany on this question. "Yes, we've already asked this question infinity amount of times over the past four years. And it is true that every time we ask the question, the President or his representatives continue to give us the same unambiguous and definitive answers. But what's wrong with answering the question one more time, in order to finally put this issue to rest? It's really quite telling, if you ask me. Simply said, the President doesn't want to lose the support of these groups."

Though it's certainly not surprising that President Trump would refuse to answer this question. It does seem like it could be problematic with his image going forward, especially in light of the narrative the media has worked very hard to shape, about him being an outright racist who not only condones groups like the Proud Boys and other racists, but also fully endorses their racist behavior.
    

Washington, D.C. — Talk about a bad day. Donald Trump likely woke up this morning to news of his income tax report hitting the New York Times and the reality that Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson publicly endorsed Joe Biden for President. However, nobody could have predicted what was coming next.

While news outlets were already working diligently, today, to maximize the fallout and collateral damage to President Trump's reelection bid, in order to set the stage for tomorrow's Presidential debate, a new story hit the press and it just might be the final blow to the Presidents campaign.

"We've had to deal with a lot over these past four years", said one spokesperson for the campaign. "Election collusion. Sexual misconnect allegations. Hush money payments. Quid pro quo assertions. Impeachment. Racism, sexism, and xenophobia...and not to mention the global pandemic and national unrest in the streets. These were all difficult obstacles in President Trump's four years in office. They took some serious energy and effort to address as we talked through strategies and plans for how we would move the our initiatives forward while so many folks are working around the clock to derail the Trump Train. But none of predicted this, and I'm just not sure we'll be able to bounce back from this one."

And what was the campaign referring to? Well, just today as the White House was focusing their efforts on spinning the President's income tax dilemma, "The Swamp" came out to publicly endorse Joe Biden for President.

"It's not that we expected this endorsement ourselves. I mean President Trump did run on an open and direct agenda to 'drain the swamp'", said his campaign representative. "It's really just bad timing. Too much bad news hitting at the same time becomes a nightmare to handle. Donald Trump is no armature, when it comes to controversy, but trying to manage so many attacks at the same time becomes very problematic. Especially since President Trump only has one Twitter account and only so much time to spend in the bathroom, tweeting, on any given day."

All is fair in love and politics, but to some this just might be more than even Donald Trump can handle. As good as he is at shifting focus and blaming others, this latest batch of bad news might be the final blow to an already shaky and staggering campaign.

Election officials and lawyers are bewildered by a press release from the Department of Justice, in which the department said it had begun an inquiry into a handful of military ballots in a northeastern Pennsylvania county.

On Thursday afternoon, the U.S. Attorney’s Office in the Middle District of Pennsylvania announced it had opened an inquiry into nine ballots that were found "discarded," without elaborating on what exactly that meant. All nine ballots had been cast for Trump, the release said.

"We're just really confused", said one election official we talked to. "I mean one day, President Trump literally tells us to get rid of the ballots and then the next day—when we follow through with the President's request—the Department of Justice begins an investigation. It's just really confusing."

The election official was referring to a press briefing at the White House, On Wednesday night, when President Trump—who was responding to a question about whether or not he would peacefully transition power if he was to lose the election—said, "Get rid of the ballots and you'll have a very...there won't be a transfer, frankly. There'll be a continuation".

President Trump weighed into the controversy earlier in the day on Fox News Radio.

"These ballots are a horror show. They found six ballots in an office yesterday in a garbage can. They were Trump ballots -- eight ballots in an office yesterday in -- but in a certain state and they were -- they had Trump written on it, and they were thrown in a garbage can," he said.

David Laufman, a DOJ veteran, weighed in on the conversation and shared some thoughts on why this kind of response from the DOJ is not only problematic, but also unprecedented.

​There is, however, a decent cause for some concern. In Pennsylvania, ballots cannot be opened or discarded until 7 a.m. on Election Day.
A letter from U.S. Attorney David Freed, released after the statement, provided some new details of the problem, and seemingly attributed at least part of the problem to sloppy work by election administrators — who might have confused actual completed ballots with mere applications for ballots.


"[O]ur investigation has revealed that all or nearly all envelopes received in the elections office were opened as a matter of course," read the letter from Freed, addressed to Shelby Watchilla, the director of elections for Luzerne County. "It was explained to investigators the envelopes used for official overseas, military, absentee and mail-in ballot requests are so similar, that the staff believed that adhering to the protocol of preserving envelopes unopened would cause them to miss such ballot requests."

The Department of Justice did not respond to our request for further comments. For now, this is a wait and see, but apparently the ballots President Trump was asking to get rid of, were not the ballots being cast for him.

Washington, D.C. — On Wednesday, during his press briefing at the White House, President Trump was asked a very direct question of whether he would peacefully transfer power if he was to lose the election to Joe Biden. Instead of providing a direct answer, Donald Trump did what he always does, which was exactly what Democrats were counting on.

"Well, we're going to have to see what happens. You know that I've been complaining very strongly about the ballots and the ballots are a disaster," Trump said, when asked if he could commit to the peaceful transition. "Get rid of the ballots and you'll have a very...there won't be a transfer, frankly. There'll be a continuation."

This was an alarming response, although not surprising, considering the racial and social unrest the nation has been experiencing since the death of George Floyd, in Minneapolis.

"This was the exact moment we knew we had him. It's exactly what we planned for", said one journalist we spoke with. "We were banking on President Trump's unwillingness to answer a very direct question."

When asked if the question was a setup, the journalist responded, "Of course it was a trap and he fell right into it. Now we get to use his non-response to help perpetuate our assertions that he is not only an illegitimate President and a horrific human being, but he is also intentionally walking America away from democracy towards an authoritarian regime."

Democrats, along with their allies in the media, have been working very hard to change the narrative over the past several weeks. Many Americans have indicated that the social unrest is a major concern for them and ensuring we have leadership that will put a stop to it is a high priority. The national riots and looting have caused many perspective voters to question if the Democrats have been intentionally fanning the flames of this unrest or have a plan to put a stop to the anarchy, if they win in November.

"It's critical for us to shift the blame on the national unrest. We need people to understand that while we may have been a catalyst to the national unrest, by fanning the flames with our rhetoric and misinformation, we can't be seen as the reason why the unrest is still here", said one Democrat advisor. "When recent polls began to show support for BLM declining, due to rioting and anarchy, we knew we needed to shift the blame off ourselves and on to Donald Trump."

It's a fast paced world, in Washington, D.C. Opinions can change on a dime and politicians need to adjust their strategies just as quickly. "Two weeks ago, Senator Harris was literally telling the rioters and looters they 'should not stop'", said the Democrat advisor. "Now we're doing our best to pin most of the unrest on Donald Trump. It's a fine line we must walk and we need all the help we can get. Fortunately we knew exactly where to go to get the help we needed. Donald Trump."

The verdict is still out on how American's will respond. However, if history is any indicator on what may happen in the future, the media stands a good chance of using Donald Trump's words against him to help shape American's opinions. 

"We've spent the last four years readying ourselves for this very moment. When Trump was elected in 2016, we came up with a plan to ensure he would never be reelected. He's proven himself to be a valiant opponent, but our plan is playing out exactly how we've expected it to and the President's response last night is no exception."

St. Petersburg, FL — With recent polls moving Florida from "leaning democrat" a to toss-up state, democrats are scrambling to figure out how they will ensure a victory in Florida. With its massive 29 electoral votes, many view Florida as a must-win for Donald Trump's reelection campaign. In fact, the last Republican to win the White House without winning Florida was Calvin Coolidge in 1924. The trouble is, Florida is no longer a sure win for Democrats and that has many of them searching for new angles to ensure they win the state.

"We were very confident that with all deceased voters choosing Biden, we'd be able to focus our money and effort on other swing states", said Greg Schultz, Biden's campaign manager. "But things have taken an unexpected turn, here in Florida, and we are now facing a bit of uncertainty."

Uncertainty might be an understatement. In a recent boat parade, in Lee County, the unofficial number of boats participating was as many as 11,000; which might be an actual world record. This show of support, for President Trump, deflated any confidence the Democrats had that they would be able to walk away with a Florida victory on November 3rd.

"This is when we came back to the drawing board", said Schultz. "We weren't going to keep all our eggs in one basket. We remember what happened, in 2016, and we are determined to ensure that Trump and his Russian counterparts are not able to steal another election with their shady and dubious activities."

That's when the Biden campaign made the decision to reach out the Mike Bloomberg, who committed to spending some of his own money to ensure a Trump defeat. "Mr. Bloomberg is a team player. He wants what we all want", said Schultz. "Of course he was humiliated in his own run for the White House, but his main effort all along has been to ensure that Donald Trump is not reelected."

With the Biden campaign's wit and Mike Bloomberg's resources, they quickly came up with the plan to ensure more democrat votes. It wasn't going to be easy, since most voters in Florida have been around long enough to recognize that Joe Biden is a fraud and a charlatan, but then a fresh idea came to them. What about all the felons?

"It really just hit us as we were brainstorming about all possibilities", said another representative of the Biden campaign. "We told everyone in the room to throw out anything and that no ideas were to be considered too silly or too illegal."

That's when one member raised the idea of paying the fees for felons to be able to vote again. Much like the efforts by democrats to pay the bail for the criminals who were arrested around the nation during the BLM protests, this was another way of using philanthropy to exploit people. Many of the people with felonies are unable to pay the fee to ensure their suffrage. But with a little help from the kindhearted Mr. Bloomberg, the one thing keeping them from casting their votes in November was no longer an obstacle.

"This was really a clever move", said Bloomberg. "I only wish I would have thought of it myself during the democratic primaries. Then maybe I'd be having this conversation as the future next President of the United States. But I digress. In all sincerity, the only thing I really care about is making sure our current fake President is not reelected."

When asked how he can feel confident that this new segment of voters will choose Biden over Trump, Bloomberg said, "We don't really see that as an issue. One thing we aim to do, as part of our selection process, is to vet these felons for their political leanings. If they indicate they are undecided or planning to vote for Trump, then we'll simply move on. We have a pretty foolproof plan to ensure we aren't accidentally liberating possible Trump voters."

New York City, NY -- In a moment of solidarity and reassurance, CNN's Don Lemon was forced to fill the role of motivational speaker as he worked hard to reassure fellow anchor, Chris Cuomo, that there is still reason to hope.

In the wake of news today that Senate Republicans likely have enough votes to confirm President Trump's nomination for vacated seat on the U.S. Supreme Court--vacated by the recent death of Ruth Bader Ginsburg--Chris Cuomo was seemingly discouraged and hopeless.

"I could see it in his eyes. It was very sad. My fellow host and friend was in a bad place and I needed to step up and help him see a bit of light in this dark dark world", said Lemon. "I tried several times to encourage him to look at things from a different perspective, but none of my efforts seemed to be working."

And Lemon did make valiant efforts. He told Cuomo, "we're going to have to blow up the entire system", to which Cuomo responded, with a doubting shrug, "well, I don't know about that." Lemon, seeing his friends skepticism, pressed in and continued, "Yes. You know what we're going to have to do? Honestly, from what your closing argument is. You're going to have to get rid of the electoral college, because the people...the minority in this country decide who the judges are and they decide who the president is."

Cuomo then reminded Lemon that not only do you need an amendment to the Constitution, but you also need a two-thirds majority in Congress and three-quarters of the state legislatures to make that happen. Lemon tried desperately to reassure his friend and fellow Trump-hater that with a Biden victory in November, and an effort to stack the Supreme Court, they may be able to do just that, but Cuomo was still very skeptical.

"It was then that I realized, we're losing him. He's seriously more depressed and discouraged than I've ever seen him. Even more than he was when he had to admit the truth about hydroxychloroquine helping his recovery from COVID-19, or when he was faced with the facts that his brother's decision to put COVID-19 patients in nursing homes likely led to countless unneeded deaths. He was distraught and he needed a some serious pick me up. That's when I looked him in the eyes and spoke directly to his heart and said, "Chris, don't worry man. We got this!"

Those three words, "We got this" seemed to snap Cuomo out of his sadness and for the first time in the entire segment his frown turned to a grin and the light came back into his eyes. When pressed on clarification of what he was referring to in that emotional moment, Lemon said, "We got this because we have something Trump doesn't have. We have George Soros, our very own Emperor Palpatine, and we have an angry group of aggrieved Americans whom we've spent decades and dollars to create. We have a clone army that makes the Grand Army of the Republic look small. We have China, Iran, North Korea, Venezuela and the United Nations on our side. If we can't beat this bag of deplorables playing by the rules of the system, then we're going to blow up the entire system."

That's the hope CNN wants to leave with Americans. "Don't lose hope. Even if it seems we are losing and all our efforts to derail the "Trump Train" are falling short, we must remember that history is on our side. And even when it's not, we'll simply change it," Lemon said.

On Monday, during a campaign speech, Joe Biden attempted to quote the Pledge of Allegiance but instead delivered a jumbled version of it, saying, "I pledge allegiance to the United States of America, one nation, indivisible, under God, for real."

This mistake quickly hit Twitter and many right-leaning news outlets and there wasn't much the Biden campaign could do besides damage control.  And that's when the idea hit them to take a more bold step by moving this into a policy issue. The hope is that it would be an appeal to many fast-paced Americans who are interested in immediate gratification, saving time, and making things more efficient and trendy.

"We could either treat this as a blunder or a well-thought out and intentional move", said one spokesperson for the Biden campaign. "We're growing weary of backpedaling and playing defense, so we decided to take a more proactive positive approach to this one."

That's exactly what the Biden campaign is doing. They are now using the botched pledge, as well as an earlier botched quote of the Declaration of Independence, as a campaign pledge to modify and modernize both of these tired and rusty American gems.

"What we've seen, from Americans, over the past several years is that people don't care that much about American history", said Greg Schultz, Biden's campaign manager. "The things our grandparents viewed as sacred and patriotic elements of our national history are now viewed as feudal and old-fashioned. What we aim to do is use Joe Biden's nonsense to our advantage as we try to reach a new generation of Americans who seem far more interested in changing history then they are celebrating or preserving it."

A couple hours after Biden's mistake on Monday, the Official Biden website released a new policy initiative to modernize some of the most sacred and well-known historical documents and patriotic expressions and sayings. This bold move offers Biden the ability to continue to misquote any of these items, without fear of ridicule or lampoon. "What we aim to do is simply remove the ability for anyone to use this mishaps against us and rather indicate that Biden was  simply offering variations of what could eventually become the updated versions of anything he misquotes in the future", said Schultz. "It's really a clever way for us to handle what has become expected blunders whenever Mr. Biden opens his mouth."

Conceding the fact that they can't keep Joe Biden in the basement and out of the public eye forever, it does seem that this move by his campaign will quell, at least some, of the most frequent attacks about Biden's cognitive abilities and aptitude.

In case you lost track somewhere along the way, America is now officially 6-months into the 15-day initiative to flatten-the-curve.

As an effort to say, 'thank you' for your compliance and dedication to help ensure hospital capacities remain at a stable and manageable levels, the United States Government, in partnership with your local and state authorities, have gifted you with up-to but not-limited-to an additional 6-months of lock-down. 

"It's important for Americans to be aware that depending on the results of the election, in November, the additional 6-month lock-down could be limited to 3-months; assuming a Biden & Harris victory is achieved. However, if President Trump is reelected it's really difficult to say for certain when these lock-downs and restrictions will be lifted", said one member of Congress who spoke with us on the condition of anonymity.